27 May 2007


I'd been having free-floating anxiety, centered on the kittens, for a few days. Last night, I finally calmed it down by reasoning that I would put them outside, with Dovi, today, and see how it went. It started off okay. Then I went out to check on them about threeish. Even in the shaded area I'd set up for them, they were too hot. Dovi was panting. The kittens were trying to climb out of the box and blanket to get some relief. So...they're not staying outside. Instead, I'm going to block off the stairwell where they've been. It stays a fairly constant temperature there, and no direct sun.

Incidentally "free-floating-anxiety" is one of those terms that doesn't sound like much until you experience it. For me, it was a constant rush of adrenaline and consistent mild panic that occasionally flared into major panic. It was pretty obvious that leaving Dovi and the kittens was the source of the anxiety, but I have a tendency to overreact to things, so I was tending to think that my fear was irrational. The extent of the fear was certainly irrational, but it turns out that there was a valid reason for concern. *shrugs*

Distress is another innocuous sounding term that isn't when you see it close up. Poor kittens. When I brought them back inside, I pulled each of them out of the box to cool off for a bit, then put them back in. Before long, they were huddling together as normal. I was relieved. Dovi...seemed grateful. At least, she started purring up a storm. I apologized profusely and promised her they could stay inside. She didn't understand a word, but that's okay. I did. The hall is cleaned out for them, and to make it easier for Melissa when she checks on them, and I've got the board cut for the one doorway and the door pulled out of the garage for the other.

As for other preparations, I baked bread this morning. Variation of Bette Hagman's Featherlight Bread. I was going to make some banana muffins, both for me and to give to my dad, but the bananas had been sitting too long and were moldy. Still, I'm less concerned about food on this trip as compared to most prior ones. Gluten-free restaurants, here I come! :^D

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